#its so ridiculous like... that's not helping anyone
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Note
its so funny when people see an inclusionist who is part of like, every possible oppressed minority within oppressed minority groups, and then they say something inclusionist that They Specifically are against and they go like "what the hell. i thought u were better than this. i expected you to not have empathy for The Bad People." its ridiculous anyway thanks for being so chill and always open minded ur blog makes me feel safe
it makes me want to bite a chunk out of my desk
i've had this happen to me so many times over xyz thing and it baffles me. i don't get why people think that just because they like my vibe that it means that i'll agree with everything they have to say. and i really don't like it when someone struts into my ask box acting like they have pity for me, or are "scared" for me for "not knowing better". it actually pisses me the fuck off that people think they know what's best for me.
i do not understand why people look at how inclusive i am and go. i bet equinox hates (marginalized group). on what planet? i'm intersex. i'm trans. i'm bisexual. i'm biracial. i'm disabled. i'm neurodivergent. i'm mentally ill. i'm poor. i've been chronically homeless. like i could keep going. why do people think that i harbor hatred in my heart like this? i don't. i don't want anything to do with your hatred and looking down on people
i don't look down on people. i think that's what irritates me the most is when someone projects how they look down on others on to me. keep that to yourself. i'm not in the business of looking down on people who haven't harmed anyone. people really have to learn that something irritating them isn't harming them. getting annoyed is not the same as being harmed.
i don't entertain people like that because i do not owe someone i disagree with validation. i am not humoring people who think it's okay to be an asshole. if i'm well known for not being an asshole, what the hell makes people think i'll change just for them? get real. i'm not going to start excluding random groups of people from communities they rightfully occupy. maybe i just have too much lived experience, but i'm not narrow minded, and my goal in life isn't to make people feel like shit. my goal in life is to help people. hating a marginalized group will never be helping anyone
thank you for this message, genuinely, because the amount of people who have crawled into my ask box lately with the most bullshit exclusionist takes thinking that for some reason, i'll bend to pat them, in specific, on the back, has been staggering. idk why people think that i inherently agree with them just because they agree with me. i'm not your weird little yes man to pat you on the back and give you validation. i'm a person with my own thoughts.
take care of yourself, thank you so much for the kind words! i appreciate it more than i could ever express
43 notes
·
View notes
Text
avoidance is my fucking doom man, i know i should go to class but i fucking cant get myself to
#i have. so many absences it's ridiculous to go right now i know it will be worse if i dont go i have to go#ive been just tossing and turning for like 2 hours with some freakign heart palpitations cause im so fucking scared#i was supposed to go last week and i didnt do it then either and every time i feel worse but i cant make myself go#AAAAAAAAA Im gonna die here i know i just have to force myself but i dont want to i want to stay at home which will fix nothing and#make everything worse in the long run#im aware of thsi but i still cant get myself to go idk what to do in this situation i feel horrible augh#i have so many absences I literally went once at the start of the semester and it's been what. 2 and a half months almost 3#i didnt do much for the class and i didnt go to class idk what to do.. theres literally no other way than to force myself to go#i KNOW I'll instantly feel better if i just stay home. i knowww i knowwww but its not going to help anything#i feel like shit and so ashamed and i just really dont want to go through this#FUUCK#im just#completely in panic mode rn. idk if i wont just try to go tomorrow idk if this is a bad decision im still just putting it off#im just totally by myself and cant even talk to anyone to calm down uauauhcgchdhd#im feeling pretty pathetic rn i should be able to do thisss i should be able to do this by myself#this is like self inflicted psychological horror and it's like every other day for me for many years now ouughh
35 notes
·
View notes
Text
i keep thinking about the datamined conversation between halsin and minthara and what gets me about it is that if you side with halsin and turn minthara away, thats objectively the bad choice.
like at this point, you've rescued minthara from moonrise. you know now that she was being controlled to act against her will. you've gone to the trouble of rescuing her from her tormentors, and you've experienced what it felt like as they tried to destroy her mind. you know what will happen to her if you turn her away. and if you do, you're willingly condemning her to that fate. you've essentially allowed her to experience freedom, to regain her sense of self, only to tear that away from her again.
whereas if you side with minthara, and halsin leaves, that's the only consequence he experiences. that he's not a companion anymore. at this point, we've saved the grove, we've saved him, and we've lifted the shadow curse. we've helped him achieve what hes been hoping to do for over a century. leaving your party won't see him lose his free will. he can return to the grove and live his life.
the choice is essentially either condemn someone to a fate worse than death, knowing exactly what that entails vs not letting someone travel with you anymore. its pretty clear cut to me.
its just interesting to me that they've switched the morality of it around given that minthara is considered the 'evil' companion by so many.
#baldur's gate 3#baldur's gate 3 spoilers#bg3 spoilers#minthara#minthara baenre#before anyone comes at me and says that halsin is allowed to have his prejudice and his trauma. im not saying hes not#not sure about someone being allowed to have prejudice but yes thats part of human nature i guess#my point isnt that hes not allowed to react like this#my point is that hes wrong.#sure he can be struggling with his trauma and his prejudice over minthara being a lolth sworn (even if shes not anymore)#BUT. at this point we as a character /know/ theres more to her. we know that hes making an unfair assessment of her#which is even more jarring if you're a drow/lolth sworn drow#and at this point. you've saved the grove youve saved him youve helped him break the curse. he tells you its a debt he cant repay#and that hes so thankful. but he wont trust you or your decision. he won't even attempt to#and u know what thats fine. he doesnt have to. but if you're siding with him you're condemning her. you're killing her#if you side against him. he can go back to his responsibilities as an arch druid rather than leaving it in someone elses hands (which was?)#that is the lesser of the two evils here#yes you can call minthara the 'evil' character because shes a lolth sworn but thats just buying into the prejudice halsin is showing#and its wrong#anyways. my point is good for him if he wants to demand you make a ridiculous choice#but turning her away is the bad choice and tbh i feel like the game wants u to know that#and sure if you want to boil it down to which character u like more than the other and u prefer halsin. ur obvs gonna side with him#but in that case u probably wouldn't even get this conversation#because why would u have bothered to spare / save minthara in the first place?
199 notes
·
View notes
Text
sometimes in fic robin is such a voice of reason insider to steve's brain, but what about stobin toxic "dump that bitch immediately" mentality
#steve harrington#robin buckley#no questions asked automatic break up.#like its not robin: talking sense into anyone#its robin: i have already purchased the gasoline lets commit arson#like idc what u did why should i forgive u for disrespecting bestie#bold of u to assume i would willingly feed u information to win him back#like SOMETIMES i get it bc its like ok this is actually ridiculous and as an outsider i know that both of u are being stupid so i'm helping#but sometimes it's like i'm so loyal that i do nawt need to hear a second opinion ur done#if bestie gets back with u thats Their decision i was actively rooting for ur downfall#u can kiss my ass for however long ur relationship was but if bestie complains once to me ur getting punished
21 notes
·
View notes
Text
This Home of Mine
How had it come to this?, Aviloh asked himself as the argument around him began to get louder. Somehow he had known it would all end horribly one day. He just had hoped it would take a little longer. He only had himself to blame for this, he thought as his eyes fearfully scanned the crowd that was slowly gathering around them.
There at the sidelines stood U‘khaya with a gleeful expression on her face. She knew this would happen, he realised. But A’viloh wasn’t the kind of person to blame her for what happened…
U‘khuba‘s twin sister had always been following the boys around even when they all had still been kids. She had been a brave and stubborn little girl, maybe a little mean sometimes but not more so than her brother. A‘viloh had always thought she was following them because of Khuba - twins being inseparable or something. Never had he imagined the reason would be Laqa instead.
Of course he could have guessed it. Everyone loved Laqa! Apparently Khaya wasn’t an exception in this matter.
That evening - before the argument - A‘viloh had waited for quite some while by the pond. They had always used to hide there when they still had been kids, every time the other boys had stirred trouble or teased the girls.
By now it was one of the spots Laqa and him sometimes used as meeting points when they sneaked out of the settlement together. But today the other Miqo’te had arrived so late, A‘viloh had already started to wonder if something had happened.
“There you are!”, Aviloh said relieved as Laqa finally appeared just when he was about to go searching for him. “I was already worried. Did something happen?”
The blonde Miqo’te made an annoyed face. “Just Khaya happened…”
A’viloh didn’t understand. “Khaya? What’s wrong with her?”
“Everything apparently!”, Laqa exclaimed disgruntled, which made A‘viloh even more confused.
Laqa sighed.
“She waylaid me on my way outside.”, he explained but couldn’t help to look a little angry still. “Started talking some nonsense about how impressed she was about the quarry from our last hunt and how it is a shame that it isn’t me leading the tribe instead of father.”
A’viloh furrowed his brows, still not quite connecting the dots. Laqa grimaced. “Then she threw herself at me and tried to kiss me.”
“She what?”, A‘viloh exclaimed a little louder than intended, with a mix of shock and disbelief on his face.
Laqa raised his hands in a calming manner. “Don’t worry! I of course told her that I am not interested. Like I ever would be anyway! We may be almost the same age but she is still my mother’s sister. What was she even thinking, Vi?”
A‘vi shrugged but couldn’t help to remember something one of Laqa’s sisters had once told him. “Lamana mentioned that Khaya didn’t agree with some of U‘odh‘s opinions. She thought her and Khuba were still mad with him because of their father…”
“That makes no sense! They have no reason for that! It’s not like father threw them all out!”, Laqa said annoyed. “Alone because of mom he wouldn’t have! Anyway, grandpa had been old already, if not father then someone else would sooner or later have challenged him. All of them were always treated equally. Why would they be mad?”
A’viloh gave another shrug and smiled weakly. “Maybe it’s none of that and she really just is a little in love with you… I can’t blame her…”
Laqa lightly glared at him, as if he wanted to say “this isn’t funny”, but couldn’t help to grin himself.
“It’s still absurd!”, he said while shaking his head.
“You think?”, A‘viloh asked and chuckled. “I wouldn’t be surprised if half the village was secretly in love with you.”
Laqa made a sound somewhere between an annoyed huff and a suppressed laugh. Then he stretched out a hand for A‘viloh to take. As A‘viloh did so Laqa pulled him closer and wrapped his arms around him. “Too bad for them that the only one I will ever love is you.”
All too willingly - too carelessly! - A’viloh melted into the other Miqo’te’s embrace. Laqa saying things like this never failed to give him a warm and fuzzy feeling. Just as much as Laqa kissing him always made his heart skip a beat and his mind go silent.
Gently A‘viloh wrapped his arms around the taller Miqo’te’s neck, like an invitation to pull him even closer and deepen their kiss, when suddenly a sound appeared nearby. Their ears, currently slightly drooped, attentively shot up and both Miqo’te instinctively turned to see where the unexpected sound had come from.
Without doubt, there by one of the larger rocks nearby, eyes wide and mouth agape in disbelief, stood a Miqo’te girl with dark hair and bright blue eyes.
Khaya!
This was the exact moment A‘viloh knew he was in trouble.
“Khaya…”, Laqa was the first one to find his voice again. He sounded almost as if he wanted to reassure a shy animal, but it only made the girl unfreeze, whirl around and run away. “No! Khaya, wait!”, Laqa called and ran after her. He probably wanted to explain, wanted to beg her to stay silent, but A‘viloh knew it was too late already.
With his heart hammering against his chest and his thoughts racing he stood there and just watched them go. For a second he wondered what he should do now. But he had nowhere else to go, probably no one else who would defend him apart from Laqa. So slowly he followed them back to the settlement, wishing he could just vanish into thin air.
***
“Tell me this isn’t the thruth.”, U‘odh demanded from his son. His voice was still relatively calm but there already was a tone in it, a kind of threatening sound that also reflected on his face.
For a moment the thought crossed A’viloh’s mind, that Laqa could simply have lied. That he simply could have denied everything. Maybe, just maybe, his father would have believed him.
But that wasn’t like Laqa.
“It’s true!”, Laqa admitted and turned his face a little bit to look at A‘viloh, who so far had stood a few steps behind him, trying to stay out of U’odh’s attention. “A‘vi and I are a couple.”
A murmur went through the crowd and somehow even A‘viloh felt surprised to hear him say this so bluntly for everyone to hear. U‘odh laughed, but it lacked any humor. A’viloh already looked very uncomfortable but when the nunh’s sharp eyes landed on him, he almost flinched away and cast his eyes down to the ground.
“That weak little welp?!”, U’odh spat out, speaking to his son but still looking and pointing at A’viloh. “What do you want with him?! He’s good for nothing!”
A’viloh had never quite understood this either. There were so many better people than him and still Laqa had chosen him instead. Carefully A‘viloh glimpsed up at Laqa and could see his whole body tense up against the nunh’s insulting words. Stubbornly Laqa stared into his father’s eyes and growled.
“Don’t you dare to speak of him like that! I don’t care if he can fight or not, he is kind and wonderful and I love him!”
But U‘odh simply shook his head and laughed condescendingly.
“Love?! Don’t be foolish now… you know nothing about love.”
That had been too much for Laqa.
Usually no one dared to speak up against U‘odh no matter how harsh his words sometimes were. But Laqa, in a way just like his father and in another just like his mother, never had known how to back down. The anger about the situation and also about his father didn’t help, so his next words sounded especially blunt and sharp, more so than he probably truly thought.
“More than you! You wouldn’t recognise love if it stood right in front of you! Because you are just a bitter resentful man who doesn’t know how to love!”
Shocked gasps sounded from the crowd and everybody stared at either Laqa or his father, waiting for a reaction. For a few long seconds both remained silent. But while Laqa just stared at the older Miqo’te with a stubborn, unyielding face, the nunh‘s face changed slowly but entirely. All the mockery faded from his face and instead his expression turned to an angry snarl.
A‘viloh knew he would only end up in the crossfire but if he didn’t do something now, they would certainly fight and that was the last thing any of them could want. He didn’t really know what to say but scraped up all his bravery and stepped forward a bit. Trying to divert their attention from each other he spoke up, still quiet but clearly audible against this deadly silence.
“Please stop, I don’t —“
But U’odh wasn’t going to listen to whatever he had to say. Furiously he whirled towards him and stepped closer with wild rage in his eyes.
“No one allowed YOU to speak, you pathetic little weakling! Get out of my sight, you are none of my kin and I never want to see your whiny face again! You are nothing but a parasite and I have suffered your presence here for long enough! Begone! You are no longer welcome here!”
Of course. A‘viloh had expected this but it still hurt to hear these words out loud. He tried not to cry but already looked quite miserable already, even without tears. U’odh however wasn’t done with him yet.
“Oh, how I regret the day I allowed you to stay here! I wish you had just died with the rest of your miserable family!”, the nunh hissed and looked as if he was about to attack A‘viloh with more than just hurtful words.
With tears in his eyes A‘viloh shivered in fear and flinched away. He had never seen U’odh so furious before. But before the man could loose his self-control entirely and really tried to strike at him, Laqa stepped between them and protectively wrapped his arms around A‘viloh.
Instantly everything went silent again. Everyone seemed shocked by what had happened or what U’odh had just said. Even the nunh himself seemed stunned when he saw his son’s disgusted face, staring at him. But U‘odh was not the kind of man to give in or admit his failures. Instead he quietly but sharply said, “Don’t look at me so. My word is final. He is none of our family and I want him gone by tomorrow.”
With a strange mixture of defiance and sadness Laqa looked at his father for a moment, before he spoke.
“In that case I don’t consider you my family any longer either. A place where A‘vi isn’t welcome I cannot call my home. If you send him away, I will go with him!”
Briefly a shadow crossed his face but then U’odh looked entirely unfazed again.
“Where would you even go?”, he asked and shook his head dismissively.
“Anywhere but here...”, Laqa replied coldly and turned to A’viloh. “Let’s go and pack our things.”
All of this had happened so suddenly A’viloh still could not quite believe it. No matter what U’odh had said, for him this place was still his home and the people here the closest thing he had to a family. He didn’t want to leave.
“What? Now?”, he asked and pleadingly looked to Laqa, hoping that there was some way to make everything right after all.
“Yes! I’m sure we can stay with the Flames for one night and tomorrow morning we leave.”
His decision seemed to be final, just as U’odh’s. What was A’viloh supposed to do against that?
Laqa made a point of taking A‘viloh’s hand so everyone could see it and knew to whom his loyalty belonged. Slowly he let his gaze wander over the crowd of curious faces giving them one last chance to speak up but they all remained silent.
With a last disappointed look at his father he turned around and walked away, unconcerned that they all stared at them as they left.
#ffxiv#ff14#final fantasy xiv#final fantasy 14#ffxiv writing#ffxiv screenshots#ff14 screenshots#ffxiv gpose#gpose#Aviloh Tia#Laqa Tia#I'm sorry for writing Avi in distress again...#but I was thinking about writing this for so long now it was only a matter of when instead of if#Besides now me not using the U for Laqa's name tag maybe makes some more sense XD#btw the title is a line of lyrics#I wonder if anyone recognizes it...#probably not though...#Its from a song called Family by Badflower#It may not fit perfectly... maybe its more of a Laqa song... but I think it has good bits for each of their feelings probably...#besides am I the only person wondering if Miqo’te have a rather Targaryen approach to relationships?#once again I feel like I have to say a few defending words about U’odh xD#First it wasn’t the fact of A‘vi being a guy that annoyed him - I think that’s pretty much not an issue in this world#Just the fact that Miqo’te culture seems very survival of the fittest to me#and A‘vi while helping with whatever work there is in the village is just not particularly strong or anything#also I think U‘odh honestly loves all of his children just can’t show it very well due to this whole you have to look strong mentality xD#I also think he at least really loved Laqa’s mother after all I imagine he challenged her father just so he was allowed to be with her…#Tbh I build so much background lore about this whole family in my head it’s absolutely ridiculous xD#Maybe an issue for him not approving Laqa being in love with someone as weak as A’viloh is also Laqa’s mother#I imagine she was a good hunter but also didn’t have a good health and died of some sickness resulting from that which broke his heart#enough rambling of lore I should put into text instead of here 🙈
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
my brain is too self conscious i keep being worried that im posting about sonic too much. in the posting website. and im like oh noooo i should post less or post a bigger Variety of Content so my Public wont be Annoyed at me but secretly in my drafts and queue theres just 28364 sonic posts im not allowing myself to post LOL LOL
#again i know its ridiculous i dont need to be self concious about TUMBLR but i get crazy anxious anyway#as if everybody who followed me hasnt followed for a completely different interest 5 months ago anyway#i guess i feel particularly lonely because other than my brother i dont have any mutuals who are into sonic rn ?#so i dont have anyone to talk about it to or post about it together so i cant help but feel like im just being annoying here all on my own#i just want to talk about the hedgehogsssssssssssssssssss#🧃.txt
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
need Guz to hug me tightly for like an hour solid oh my god dhdjdkl I went driving for the first time in over a year and I chewed my lip raw 😭😭
I'm starting to look like a caricature of Anxiety with all these physical symptoms and signs LMAO
#this is so ridiculous fhfjdkdl#i do not like driving fjdkdl i know i should not be on the roads#but unfortunately i have to bc i live rural and also my parents insist i ''just need more practice''#practice is not going to fix the dissociation 😭😭 practice will not fix the Other Drivers being shitty and scary and reckless fjfkdl#it might make it slightly easier bc i wont have to think as hard about shoulder and mirror checks and roadsigns and speed limits#and where i am located on the road and intersection rules and whatnot#but like... it does not fix that i live in a town (and world lol) where ppl are fucking bonkers on the road#i had someone riding my ass for like a full five minutes. we had only two feet btwn us. MAYBE. IF THAT MUCH.#he was BIG mad that i was going the speed limit#and THERES A POLICE STATION LIKE RIGHT NEAR THAT AREA MY GUY IM NOT GONNA GO OVER THE SPEED LIMIT RIGHT THERE LMAO ????#also im a rule follower usually so i do tend to go Exactly the speed limit fjfkdl#and maaannn that makes people SO fucking angry dhfjdl its impossible to drive Anywhere without having someone right on ur bumper#its so ridiculous like... that's not helping anyone ??? ur not getting to ur destination faster by riding up on somebodys ass ???? hewwo ???#ANYWAYS. i drove around the neighborhood and then went up the highway and thru some intersections and then into the main core of town#and then i got my dad to take over from there bc it was lunch hour and the core of town is a lawless land at the best of times#MY NERVES ARE FRIED. i need Guz to act as a weighted blanket or one of those pressure therapy vests for me LOL#im like... shaking fhdjsl that was far more than i thought we were going to do for driving today good lord#IM OKAY THOUGH I SURVIVED I DIDNT EVEN HIT A CURB OR ANYTHING#i think I've only hit a curb once so far in all my times driving and that was on my second time driving on a road i think#so pretty good track record... im a very careful driver fjdkdl i work so hard to be safe and drive smoothly#during my driving test the only thing the test guy had to critique was that i waited at an intersection when i could've gone#but the reason i waited was bc i wasnt sure i could make it across the traffic lane before the oncoming vehicle got to us#so it was like. a safe decision overall but a little too hesitant which can actually be unsafe fjdkdl#AUGH ANYWAYS SORRY FOR RAMBLING SM#driving stresses me out so bad and my lip is all raw now and i have so many physical stress symptoms the past few days fhfjdl#after tonight i should be able to calm down a bit hopefully fhfkdl theres a thing we're going to tonight thats been stressing me out so bad#but after tonight it'll be over and hopefully I can get myself settled down again fjfjdkl#dandy.cmd#vent //
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
mike wheeler core
#byler#i genuinely cant take some scenes in st srsly bc its ridiculous#like bro pls people are literally dying now is not the time for staring#but the poor boy is enamoured so ig he cant help it#anyway i made it onto sad quotes tt and it wont let me leave so#anyone else there#some of that shit is BRUTAL like damn i came here to watch the new influx of will edits post noah coming out🙄🙄#not to read a sentence that somehow entirely sums up my relationship w my mother
20 notes
·
View notes
Note
Roots is the best 😁 Thanks for updating even though you seem insanely busy
wow thank you for reading AND for your kind words!!!! 🤩 I will be less busy later this week once I finish moving, but thankfully the hardest part (writing the actual fic) was finished in the summertime
nowadays I just try to catch typos/fix errors/change sentences I hate/etc each week before I post. big BIG shoutout to the loml @volturialice for giving each chappy a look-through and catching all my bad habits so that the story reads soooo much smoother 😭 between her corrections and @perihelions-crew also clocking all of my typos/grammar fuck-ups, it's making roots my most thoroughly edited and well put-together fic i've ever written in my LIFE 🥰🥰🥰
#not only have I never written a big fic like this + written DRAFTS of a story before#but i've never had anyone edit/beta/proofread like this#and its SO HELPFUL oh my GOD???#i'm learning that i love me a fuckin... passive voice and also i love to use the wrong its/it's#anyways having talented + smart friends who are willing to read your ridiculously long fic to help make it better is priceless baby#roots
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
okay but how do you ask for help when your childhood makes you feel guilty for needing help and the help that you need feels rude to ask for
#im really struggling to function rn and i finally accepted that i wont make it to my appt without help#so i posted on my snap story asking if anyone could come over for a few hours to help me get back on track#n. two people replied saying they cant but hope i find someone but no one else has replied at all#i knew the answer would probably be no bc no one has time to come all the way here to help me to do tasks i should be able to do alone#but idk i thought i might get some comfort or encouragement or something. just some acknowledgement#i wish i had a group chat or something where i could reach out to people. bc things like snap stories people are just flicking past#i NEED to change the kitty litter today i have no choice its unusable and needs changing but i just. how. i am so tired#i have a ridiculous amount of glasses n crockery specifically for when i struggle like this n yet im still almost completely out of them#bc i just. cant do the dishes. i dont even have to wash them they just need to go in the dishwasher n i Cant#my brain just completely shut down once i got back from the trip#especially bc i got a cold n i dont cope well being sick at all#but of course thats another reason i feel bad asking for help. bc my house is full of germs. n i dont want people to get sick bc of me#but i am running out of food and clean dishes and bench space and i just. cant do it alone rn#but i used up my asking capabilities posting on snap#posting on insta would prob get more people to see it but insta feels. much more public#i dont use my insta stories like ever so it feels like a Lot to post on it for this#n when i asked for support after my parents divorce i only got a couple responses anyway#n this is. not worth support. like its a problem of my own making? i went on the trip knowing it would be a Lot for me#i wasnt planning on getting sick And getting an infection which are both exhausting me a lot but thats not the point#idk im just beating myself up over here. idk how to ask for help esp bc i expect the answer to be no anyway#like who is gonna travel an hour+ to help their friend clean their kitchen and fill out paperwork. im 28 i should be able to do that stuff#these tags are getting very maudlin and mean to myself. sigh. i wish i didnt feel so guilty when i need help#i wish i felt like i was allowed to ask for and accept help#love that childhood and autistic trauma haha lmao#anyway. brains are annoying. and im struggling a lot.
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
4
edit: 4 was NOT supposed to be there i dont know how it happened
Like I know we all love making ADHD seem cool but like, don't forget it's actually a disability? My ADHD is bad enough I've nearly been evicted for forgetting to mail the rent check to the property manager, I've forgotten to pay the utility bills and had my water or power get turned off or had to pay fines bcs I missed a credit card payment. Once I was supposed to cat sit for a friend and I lost the house key she gave me but didn't realize until she was already out of town, and she had to call the apartment office to get someone to give me the spare so her cats would have food for the week. When I'm unmedicated I can't even get myself to shower half the time, forget eating or cleaning. Before I started living with my fiance I'd just like, not eat for days because I didn't have anyone to remind me to eat or go buy me food. I've forgotten to turn the stove off so many times and ruined kettles and tbh been DAMN fucking lucky the house didn't burn down. I've done stupid, impulsive shit that's nearly gotten me KILLED. I can't remember to close the shower curtain reliably even through my fiance points out every single time I forget, and he's almost out of soap rn bcs for the last MONTH neither of us have been able to remember to order more once we get out of the shower.
I've had such bad memory my entire life that to this day someone suggesting I forgot something because I simply didn't care enough is a legitimate trigger that, in the worst cases, makes me have a breakdown.
I get that for some of you this is just something that makes studying hard or you forget to take a pee break when you're playing Minecraft or whatever, that's still a valid struggle and you do deserve help and understanding, but like, ADHD is a disability. It's disabling. It's not impossible to improve and learn coping skills, meds help a lot, there are great accommodations out there(LIKE CLEANING SERVICES), but not every case of ADHD is the same, and a lot of them are pretty ugly ngl, and just because you managed to do something doesn't mean someone else is gonna be able to manage it too, or that they're being lazy for struggling. And that obviously doesn't mean ADHD people have a free pass to never work on themselves and make everyone cater to their every need or whatever, but we do deserve some understanding when we explain that our disability is actually disabling in ways that aren't palatable to you. So like, idk, maybe don't immediately recoil in horror when you find out that someone with ADHD can't keep their house clean. And for fucks sake don't ridicule them for it.
#yeah. I have pretty severe adhd and along with impacting my focus and things#i have really bad memeory problems because of it. medication doesn't even help that. Like you could tell me something thats really fucking#important or spill out feelings to be and id probably forget it all in the span of a few hours to a day.#i forget to eat. I forget to brush my teeth. i forget to shower. i forget to drink water. i forget to clean things.#i also want to add that. I can have major meltdowns because of my adhd. And I bet other people have that happen too#I dont know about other people but#i would NOT want to be avoided or treated badly in general because of a meltdown. There's at least a few other people who can agree with th#I know im not the only one. So please#dont ridicule people with adhd for not keeping their house clean or forgetting something you said#and don't be a bitch because someone had a meltdown they couldn't control#this isnt me saying “ohhh when someone does ____ in a meltdown they still shouldnt have consequences”“! no.#i fully believes in taking responsibility for your actions#but you guys also need to remember that we arent in the right mind AT ALL during that. i know I can be extremely unpredictable and sometime#violent towards myself or others during the breakdowns#yes I am aware that is not ok.#i will take consequences for my actions#but if you're just going to tell me to stop doing shit for attention or to “stop crying its already happened”#stay the fuck away from me.#(btw i had a worker at a mental hospital do that to me. He also got angry at me and snatched my clothes away from me when i was trying to#get them in the dryer because i was acting confused and was taking too long#what was actually happening was that i was stuck trying to process all the instructions he gave in like less than a minute.#i then had a meltdown after he snatched the clothes away from me. I didnt get violent but i was screaming. not at anyone#just screaming because of how distressed i felt in the moment over that. I felt like i wasnt understood#it felt like nobody even gives me a chance before i get stopped for “being too slow”.#because yes#i can take a while to process things sometimes.#but that doesnt give anyone the right to be an asshole to me in(at least I'd thnk so)#so along with not ridiculing someone for not having their help clean#not brushing their teeth or not drinking enough water#dont be an asshole because someone with adhd had a meltdown and also be patient with them.
15K notes
·
View notes
Text
Every time I see a post on twitter all like "Remember, the left sides w/ facists!!!" or something along those lines I have two thoughts
1: okay so you're gonna vote for the actual facists instead? 2: nice try bot-we went through this already fuck off
#txts#its....so stupid#yes yes no side is perfect because holy shit thats a lot of people that'd need to be perfect#but i don't think if you get the choice between actual shit vs warm drink you'd choose to drink the shit#at least try to make life better and stop whining#'its hopeless' its not you just gotta work for it#and even if things turn out bad you at least did good instead of rolling over and just letting the bad happen#even with the gaza stuff#yeah no shit genocide is bad#neither side are gonna make it stop#but do you want a dictatorship that makes it worse for everyone and is gonna get more wars started#or not?#vote dem#put pressure on to stop the genocide happening#and in the meantime donate to reputable sources and so on#you can't help anyone if your own country is burning#and acting like letting someone trample over everything good that has been built over decades#is somehow the better option or saving anyone except a few select rich assholes#is ridiculous
0 notes
Text
pornstar!sukuna who has a niche for the dark and dangerous, he only accepts shoots that cater to his more… intense nature—ropes and chains and gags and rigs beyond the regular bedroom scenes.
pornstar!sukuna who works with many other actors and actresses. he's demeaned and degraded more people for a pay check than he can count, but his favourite is you. you’re not so easy to break, which he likes—plus, videos in which you bite back make double the profit.
pornstar!sukuna who is easy to agree when you call him one night asking for a favour. you were meant to do a camshow with another pornstar when he cancelled last minute—and you know people are excited for this one, if you don’t want to miss out on a paycheck you’d need to find a quick replacement.
pornstar!sukuna who is expecting a homemade bd/sm rig to greet him when he walks into your home that night.
pornstar!sukuna who isn’t expecting a bed with a pink duvet and matching fluffy pink handcuffs hanging from your headboard. it’s cute, he thinks—he can picture the scene, you laid out and fucked like a whore in pink. he’s eager, until you tell him the handcuffs aren’t for you, but for him.
pornstar!sukuna who is about ready to walk out, to tell you off for even assuming he’d do such things on camera, that he'd ruin his crafted image of this sadistic figurehead for a camshow of all things.
pornstar!sukuna who just can't say no and turn on his heels, not when you look up at him like that, your pretty eyes just too convincing. He's seen you fucked out and stupidly cockdrunk before, he knows what you look like when you submit wholly to him, and though it's a beautiful sight—one of his favourites—he can't deny that he's intrigued to know how you look through his eyes when they're glossed with desperate pleasure.
pornstar!sukuna, the notorious dominant, who loads up on thousands. of peoples screens handcuffed to a pink bed. Everything pink: the cuffs, the sheets, his mussed hair, the pretty blush that paints the bridge of his nose, the leaky tip of his cock as you stroke it, your nails painted pink to match.
pornstar!sukuna who growls when people start tipping each time he gets close to cumming. who looks so insanely out of place, big and imposing and so covered in tattoos that even his ridiculous length has been inked to an extent, all needy and growing all the more desperate as you keep denying him his orgasm. wrists chained to your wooden headboard, his muscles ache with the temptation of breaking free.
pornstar!sukuna who can't help but wonder if his life has been flipped on its head when you start praising him and he moans at your words alone. Who, for all his life has gotten off on inflicting the worst onto others, and can now feel the most powerful orgasm of his life cresting when those narcotic words spill from your lips. "doing so well for me, god you look good like this, sukuna."
pornstar!sukuna who can only hold on for so long before his taut-pulled patience snaps and burns on impact. so when he's watching himself through the display of your laptop, cock red and angry as it leaks in need at your denial of his orgasm again, he snaps.
pornstar!sukuna who breaks your handcuffs with one pull, and has you flipped over and taking his mean cock in less time than it takes you to process his movements. who is glad you were enjoying torturing him, because you're so wet that the stretch of his cock is only searingly painful and you're not pushed to tears... this time.
pornstar!sukuna who fucks you mindless for toying with him for so long. for airing out a side of him that is weak in the bones for you, and plastering it on the internet for anyone to see. he bullies his cock into you, mean and unrelenting—yet whispers the sweetest of nothings into your ear as he does so, low enough that your mic can't pick up on them—your ears only.
pornstar!sukuna who kisses you when he cums. his lip piercing cold against your lips, your legs shaking in desperate need for mercy as he paints your insides white.
pornstar!sukuna who laughs when you, in your cum-drunk haze, try to reach for your laptop to turn off the camshow.
pornstar!sukuna who promises your now-doubled viewer count that the stream won't end until you've come ten times on his cock—he's going to make an example out of you.
#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#sukuna smut#ryomen sukuna#ryomen sukuna smut#ryomen sukuna x reader#ryomen sukuna x you#sukuna ryomen#sukuna#jjk sukuna#jujutsu sukuna#sukuna x reader#sukuna x reader smut#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader#pstarsukuna
9K notes
·
View notes
Text
Its honestly super funny watching terfs reblog one of my really old posts with a response from a now deactivated terfs response that is just my post copy pasted with a few key words changed. Mostly, cause they are stupid and don't realize I can see their mains. Their crypto mains where they claim to only use they/them or have a list of LGBT identities that are never spoken about anywhere else on their blogs.
It's funny because that post hasn't had activity in royal YEARS and the only people keeping it alive are terfs. The only people who like it and reblog it are terfs and I check. I check every note I get from every blog that Interacts with me. I make sure the people interacting with me are up to snuff. I can see you :) I know what you are you little idiot :)
Not to mention, small aside, when I was scrolling through and blocking lots of them, I saw that I hadn't blocked certain terfs I know for a fact I've blocked in the past. Like 3+ years past. And yet, they weren't blocked? I scrolled alittle bit here and keyword searched there and found out why. They had gotten termed and remade XD they got their dumbasses reported and termed. At least I can say with my own blog that this wasn't termed cause I was harassing innocent people for the short time it was termed
Oh and I also got my account.bsck because I was actually unfairly termed, unlike them lmao
#levi speaks#without going into a shit ton of detail my vent account got my whole account termed#despite being perfectly tos abiding#mostly because i was factually talking about ed and tumblr is so scared of proanas they term ANYONE who talks about ana#i wasnt being overly chatty about it nor was i remotely condoning it or glorifying it but i still got termed#if i get termed after this its because i mentioned this lmao#like wtf i didnt run in any spo circles and i was following recoverh blogs#they term perfectly fine recovery blogs too despite their whole warning if you look up just the word of that disorder#thst they want people to seek help and feel safe etc but term recovery blogs cause they talk about just having that disorder#its fucking ridiculous
0 notes
Text
I'm in the UK. To renew a blue badge (aka getting a new one, there's no easy renewal form/button) you need the past five years of medical history. It lasts three years.
You can't walk due to a permanent disability? Yeah we need evidence of the past 5yrs of medical history. Yes even though nothing's changed. Yes even though you gave us half of this last time.
It's the same with freedom passes. As if someone who's profoundly deaf is going to magically have gained their hearing back (the pass lasts 5yrs but they ask for evidence you still need it after 2-3yrs).
It's a pisstake, aimed to stop people claiming I'm sure.
the government "checking in" on disabled people to make sure were still disabled is one of the most demeaning and humiliating things out there, how is there no checkbox that says "this persons disability is lifelong and incurable" why do you think people's amputated limbs will grow back, are you on the hunt for the return of jesus christ and your way of catching him is hoping that the blind will see again????
#you may ask how I know this#given that I work in a library and don't know anyone in my social life who has a blue badge#about half our work is govt or council forms#or scanning evidence for such#council phone lines for blue badge help are open two days a week for two hours each day#we're a community library#we're not even run by the council#funding from them is extremely minimal#we SHOULDNT BE THE DEFAULT SOCIAL SERVICES FOR THESE DAMMIT#and yet#theres us and citizens advice#citizens advice send ppl to us bc theyre so full#our appts are booked up until early may#ppl come in for walk-ins but if they need help with the whole form then tough luck you gotta wait a month and i HATE it#If you're going to make disabled people go through this humiliating process then at least have somewhere available for help ffs#🔪🔪🔪#also we have ON THE REGULAR ppl who need help with pip forms bc FUCK are those complicated but you gotta fill those out within#a month of them being filled out#and with reference to the tags above#you can see why this is an issue#its not just our borough we have people from several boroughs away#ppl sent by their gp#pip forms take like 3hrs to fill out so they HAVE to have appts#its ridiculous#i HATE having to tell ppl who are almost in tears that we dont have an appt in time for the deadline#and that maybe if they call the dwp theyll extend the deadline#bc they have a date set for getting the form filled out so its not like nebulous and excuses#and i HATE that thats all we can do#anyway these tags arent so much related to the original point sorry but i had to get them out#bc the problems caused by that just makes the whole system more humiliating and WORSE
28K notes
·
View notes
Text
There's this really cool thing that a handful of diaspora Palestinians have committed a lot of time and effort to called vetting (maybe you've heard of it?) in which they speak directly with a fundraiser holder face-to-face or over phone/video call to verify all portions of a fundraiser. There are so many posts [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] that talk about the details of this process to verify that a fundraiser organizer, recipient, and the details are correct by verifying legal documents like proof of residence, photo ID, fluency in Palestinian-Dialect Arabic, family tree constructions, etc.
These vetters have been posting about Palestinian/Gaza/Arab culture/Islam/etc. for a really long time, [1] [2] [3] (these are Wayback machine links to the tumblr accounts of 90-ghost, el-shab-hussein, & nabulsi before you start crying "but, you can post backdate on tumblr!") [4] (moayesh's Instagram because his tumblr is fairly new) meaning that they didn't just pop up after Oct 2023 to start posing as a qualified individual. They are real diaspora Palestinians with stories to tell and culture to share.
GFM also has strict requirements for withdrawing money, needing evidence of a bank account from a country they service and a solid way to transfer funds from that bank account to the recipient's bank account. If the funds are withheld from the intended recipient, that can be reported to and resolved by GFM.
If you're too overwhelmed by trying to distinguish between scams and real fundraisers, then whatever. That's your problem, not everyone else's. You don't need to publicly announce to everyone that you're too busy/tired/incompetent/ignorant to properly investigate fundraisers, so everyone else should stop supporting them as well. There are plenty of vetters and scam-busting blogs dedicated to helping people distinguish between real and fake.
Donating to established nonprofit aid organizations is absolutely a good deed and is much more straightforward, but it's not the only way to help. Especially with the repeated aid blockages, sometimes Ghazan families need a more direct flow of money to pay for the ridiculously inflated cost necessities (I recently received a video from Farah wherein she states that a bottle of dish soap cost $50. $50!!!!) as well as save up for evacuation costs once the Egyptian border crossing opens. (Thousands of dollars!)
With a few minor parts removed, here is a copy/pasted text that was originally in a reblog but now in its own post since the original account is gone. Links that didn’t work anymore have been left out. I figured it’d be useful for anyone who needs it.
3K notes
·
View notes